Reflecting on 2015: What I learned this year

I have come to accept that my memory is not great. Looking back on the year that was leaves me with general impressions, swaths of emotions over time periods and only a few distinct memories. I indulged in a couple of hours of reflecting on 2015 and looking ahead to 2016 using Amanda Viviers questions, a highly worthwhile exercise-especially if you are a writer or creative in any way. I was left with impressions of these being my take away lessons from this year:

  • Deep community can develop in only a year– I find it hard to fathom that some of my closest friends today were really only acquaintances at this time last year. It has taken pushing myself out of my comfort zone, being more open than usual, serving together and God’s timing!

  • Growing capacity does not equal perfect performance in all areas– there is no doubt in my mind that my capacity has stretched immensely this year and yet I feel so far from the expectations I hold in my heart in many ways. I have to let go of perfect and view progress. 

  • Time with my daughter is truly precious and short- my baby starts school next year. I don’t think I had really processed that before today. I hate how often I am more caught up in my phone or housework than in the moments I have with her. I say no to play too often and don’t take enough time to stop and really see her. She has changed so much over this year. I love her personality emerging. These days of her wanting to be held and spend time with me are numbered. I want to treasure them.

  • You don’t have to have been really close for someone’s death to have a profound impact on you- I barely knew the person that I am thinking of and yet her passing stands out as a core memory from this year. I know it is because I saw myself reflected in her. Our daughters are similar age and it forced me to look at my own mortality and consider the reality that none of us is immune from death, even if we are young with a child. My mind and heart were taken to that place of considering what it would be like to have to say goodbye to your child and loved ones. 

  • God can call you in wholly unexpected directions into a position that you feel dramatically unqualified for- I trust He knows what He is doing and that He is growing me into this!

  • It is possible for me to stick to a Scripture memorisation plan- I didn’t keep up with posting my verses on this blog but I did keep up with memorising Scripture for Beth Moore’s Siesta Scripture Memory Team. 24 verses with a few extras from church thrown in as well. I may not have them word perfect but they are buried in my heart now and have resulted in much more time meditating on His Word than previously. I plan to continue the pattern of a new verse every 1st and 15th of the month for next year.

  • I am a writer and thrive when I give myself opportunity to do so- the Write 31 Days challenge was particularly significant for me and solidified this part of my identity. It may not always look like I want it to and the words may dry up at times but writing is in my soul. Where that will take me, only God knows!
2016 is shaping up to be a year of change for our family, requiring all the lessons on increasing capacity and being brave that I have absorbed this year. I have chosen My One Word for next year and will share more on that in another post.

Linking up with Emily Freeman here.