Do I really trust God?

 Photo: Bernat Casero via photopin cc
It seems that no matter what my wrestle with faith is, the root of it is my level of trust in God. Time and time again I smash against this issue. I have grown up in church and can quote Scriptures and speak ‘Christianese’ with the best of them. It is easy to sing the songs and say the words, and even fool myself into thinking that I truly believe them in the deepest parts of my heart. And yet, what does my life say?
I have flashes of big trust but on the whole, I prefer to play it safe. The Holy Spirit has been shining His torch into some deep, dark spots. I have been forced to admit and become more conscious of the areas where my faith has been lacking. 
Why don’t I trust God to the level that I want to and that the Bible calls for? I want God to work in the ways that I consider safe. I want Him to be able to guarantee that nothing will rock my world, that my family and friends will be untouched by illness, accident and tragedy. I want life to be comfortable and easy. As I write the words, I am even more aware of how ridiculous these wants are. Life isn’t like that. God NEVER promises these things; in fact, He says the opposite.
In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration.. (John 11:33b AMP)
I have been on a journey (and will likely continue on this journey for the rest of my life) to changing these desires to reflect God’s truth more. I am changing my definition of what ‘safe’ means when it comes to God. I am learning more about who God really is. He IS safe. He IS my refuge. He IS my strong tower. The keys lie in the other sections of the verse above.
I have told you these things so that in Me you may have perfect peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer (take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted)! For I have overcome the world. (I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.) 
John 11:33 (AMP)

For the dreams that God has placed in my heart, my trust is going to have to increase exponentially. The changes I have sensed in this season are deep and not really something I can put words to just yet. The journey continues…..

This post was prompted by the Tuesday at Ten challenge. Each week a prompt word is given and a week allowed to create a post on it. If you want to join in, click on the image below or in the sidebar.